I took my first class at Amherst today, and it proved an unsettling experience. That place really scares the shit out of me sometimes. Just being there makes me resentful, all with their brisk New England charm, their buildings and facilities that aren't total eyesores. I'm always worried that one of the students will point at me and let out one of those Body Snatchers screeches, sensing my unkempt constitution and my lack of institutional pride. I saw not one dude wearing a t-shirt. Not. One. (Granted, I wasn't either; I was wearing the one casual button-down shirt I own, which I purchased at a thrift store for about five dollars.)
The class is held in this opulent lecture hall known as the "Red Room." I think of the crowded conference tables and broken window blinds of Hampshire classrooms as I sit down in a sea of padded leather swivel chairs. The professor is this geriatric guy who wears a suit and tie. I had forgotten teachers wear things like that, or lived to be that old. The syllabus claims that the course will conclude with a "Two Hour Exam." I see the words, and I know their individual meanings, but their combination appears before me like hieroglyphs on some ancient scroll.
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When I think of Amherst, all I can think of is the surprisingly high number of dumb jocks who say one thing all class, always semi-repeating what someone else already said 20 minutes ago, except it's actually just plain incorrect.
ReplyDeleteI've had some damn good professors there, though, especially this 60-something balding man who basically convinced the entire (conservative) class that marijuana should be legalized. That was awesome.
isn't institutional pride obnoxious? But you should be going to mhc or smith, that's where the pussy is, bro
ReplyDeletei have had one class at amherst, and well, it was pretty terrible. i say go in there, give it your all and teach those sons of bitches how to wear a damned tshirt.
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